


Made to fall

by Tell_me_about_it_shug



Series: And it's in the quality of the Gods [9]
Category: Ancient Greek Religion & Lore
Genre: Amphitrite is trying to help, Bittersweet, Character Death, F/M, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, Icarus is big sad, Inaccurate Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, M/M, Melancholy, Rare Pairings, i still dont know how to tag, this is a train wreck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:21:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27799141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tell_me_about_it_shug/pseuds/Tell_me_about_it_shug
Summary: She loves him gently, as water does.It suffocates him.Or: Icarus and the ocean but instead of Poseidon its Amphitrite.
Relationships: Apollo/Hyacinthus (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore), Apollo/Icarus (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore), Icarus/Amphitrite
Series: And it's in the quality of the Gods [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1607104
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	Made to fall

She loves him well enough; gentle as water does, emotionally and cool, she touches him gently, surrounding him wholly. 

It suffocates him.

Her hand is on the back of his neck when she kisses him and he can taste the mass of the vineyard on her tongue. Amphitrite is beautiful and kind enough and he supposes that he loves her but when she touches him he can feel fire licking the back of his ears but the wax on his back has cooled and become one with his skin. 

He knows he'll never love the ocean like he loved the sun; his skin is dark and made for catching the light and even though Amphitrite begrudges him nothing the salt of her skin rubs his scars differently than the rest of his sins and her touch is weak. 

Amphitrite remains unbothered though, if Icarus wanted to be loved gently he would have come to her without the force of death. 

"I would do it again." He says. The back of his arms is a mess of scarred flesh and wax. He is turned away from her and she gazes at his scarred back.

"Do what?"

"Go back to him. If I could do this all over again I would love him still." And he means it.

Apollo was easy to love, despite his initial selfishness, something all Gods seem to have in common. He was beautiful and warm, and just like the sun, and though he is harsh in that warmth, men would die without him. He loved the way fire does, passionate and all-consuming and giving. But fire is still fire and it burns. Even so, Icarus would give anything to have those hands hold his again, have them play with his hair, and feed him delicate things. 

Amphitrite is an anomaly, she is more ocean than her husband and he'll never understand why she lets him roam as freely as he does. She is vast and the brined blood of the mortals who lost their lives in her fit of anger and jealousy do nothing to her conscience; the ocean is still blue and green and translucent. 

"He hurt you," Amphitrite says like it's a question and Icarus appreciates her trying to understand. 

"He did," Icarus concedes, "But there is a difference between malice and doing something because you don't know better."

Amphitrite finds she agrees. Why would a child of Zeus know how to treat a loved one? He left Leto at the hands of Hera's rage just as he did his many other mistresses. 

"I hear he dies," Icarus says dismally.

"He does."

"Over me." 

Amphitrite smiles at this, pressing a gentle hand to his disfigured back. "Do not fret, Icarus. He has Hyacinthus now." He knows it's meant to be a comfort so he doesn't bother being upset.

"Hyacinthus." He tries the name on his tongue and is surprised by the lack of his own bitterness. 

Amphitrite nods slowly, likely trying to figure out a way to spare his feelings. "He is good for Apollo."

That brings a wave of anger and bitterness. It's a wonder it'd taken so long to come.

Icarus can feel the slow crawl of jealousy in the pit of his stomach. His lips twist bitterly but he says nothing. How is he meant to feel? He was good for Apollo but here he is trapped under the ocean with a Goddess he only kind of loves while his true love moves on without him; which is not to say he wants Apollo to keep hurting himself, Gods no. He just wants to be there with him.

All they ever did was love each other.

Maybe in another life, they could live in their glory, Apollo divorced of his godly corpse, both of them stretched out on the shore and beautiful as men in love should be. Apollo could kiss down his spin, mouth hot and burning only this time hot wax and burnt skin wouldn't be the only thing they have to show for their love.

In another life perhaps. Maybe Hyacinthus would be there too.

"No one sticks their hand in the same flame twice," Amphitrite says but there's something akin to awe in her voice like she can't fathom just how much Icarus loves him.

Icarus shrugs. "Apollo is so much more than just the God of the sun. He's a person. Just like you aren't just Poseidons wife."

Amphitrite laughs. This is the hubris of man? Anyone with eyes knew it wasn't just ego and pride that made Icarus reach for the sun.

"I love him with my whole being," Icarus says. 

"I know. That made you dangerous." Amphitrite says and he leans against her, letting her hold him. "You made a God seem touchable."

Icarus laughs and it sounds bitter and wet so Amphitrite runs her hand through his hair gently. 

"All we did was love each other." He says and tears run down his face, angry, sad, and hot.

"I know." Amphitrite just holds him tighter.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a wee bit of a mess. I heard an amazing song on tik tok called Made to fall and it inspired me. This whole thing felt messy but I wanted to post it anyway. Please comment! I love reading comments!


End file.
